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Memo From The Crushing Sense Of Ennui Desk

Here is Ryan Nyburg on Michael Moore. Nyburg is equivocal, but one bit demands a response. Actually, it doesn’t. But I’m going to respond anyway:

For all of this, [Moore] does make good points.

“The only time I’ve seen this guy (John Ashcroft) stand up for the Constitution is when he ordered the FBI to stop searching gun files. And to this day the FBI has not been allowed to find out if any of the 19 hijackers had purchased any weapons,” [Moore] said.

So tired. So very, very tired. How is it possible to rebut everything? Even someone setting out to be sceptical, like Nyburg is, will eventually start letting some of this stuff pass. The thing is, I know you’ll be shocked to hear this, but I’m passing familiar with the issue and it’s not as simple as Michael Moore reckons. I know, I know, stop the presses. Not that Ashcroft is anyone’s ACLU attorney, but… oh, just read the link. I’m going to the bar.

You know, back in my lefty heyday, one of the things I esteemed the most highly about my chosen political backwater was that we felt obliged to take a nuanced view of things, consider both sides of issues, avoid sloganeering, and so forth. Let me tell you: it seems like a long, long time ago.

  1. Timothy says:

    Sounds like a good one, that dog.

  2. Melissa says:

    We used to have a dog who ate the neighbor’s peacocks. My parents came home to find limbs and feathers scattered, and Doc bathed in blood. You should have seen the property lawsuit…

    I really miss that dog, now that I think about it.

  3. Timothy says:

    My aussie ate a bird that had knocked itself out on our window once. That was comedy gold. Running around the yard, wing hanging out of her mouth.

  4. Melissa says:

    Danimal:
    I sympathize with you on the dogs. My parents have three, all young and smart, and all of have great affinity for:
    1) dirty socks
    2) Landon’s diapers. Used or unused.
    3) Landon’s discarded food scraps.
    4) dead squirrels.

  5. Melissa says:

    “there’s no “i” in team.”

    Yes, Dan, but there is an “m” and an “e”…
    Dammit, Tim, I was baiting him so I could say that.

    Andy: what’s wrong with being high? And I’m not, I’m just really really stressed on midterms.

  6. Danimal says:

    Let’s go for 50!

  7. Danimal says:

    Oh, CHRIST.

    Melissa: I completely missed Tim’s comment about being “sparse on the ladyfolk.” Between that and not getting your Bill & Ted joke (the “dude, I’m not a dude” part, anyway), no wonder I mistook your comment.

    Well, that’s settled. All told, my panties aren’t in a bunch, but there are a bunch of panties lying around here. Lousy dogs got into the laundry basket again, and Ashley’s the big loser this time.

  8. Danimal says:

    Sure, “life” and a coupla ounces of Typhoon.

  9. Timothy says:

    On life, my friend, on life.

  10. Andy D says:

    wtf was the preceeding…

    were you all high?

  11. Timothy says:

    Eh, they’re like Lynnrd Skynnrd. Some people just don’t like the “i.” And remember, there’s no “i” in team. Perhaps not, but there are M & E. Yay ME*!

    *as in the objective case of the first-person singular in the modern English language, not former ASUO Executives Maddy & Eddy.

  12. Danimal says:

    There is an “i” in “boobings.”

  13. Olly says:

    There’s no “I” in “Team America”!

  14. Danimal says:

    Eh, they’re like Lynnrd Skynnrd. Some people just don’t like the “i.” And remember, there’s no “i” in team.

  15. melissa says:

    Stan, quisiera introducirle a “Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure.”

    http://www.movietome.com/movietome/servlet/MoviePage2/movieid-70597/Bill_and_Teds_Excellent_Adventure/

    Por favor alquiler y reloj. Usted me agradecer?.. o usted no quiz?..

    And it’s “Wyld Stallyns”. Why the letter “I” is taboo for these boys I’ll never understand.

  16. Olly says:

    Stuttering English fop? I would challenge you to a fight for that, but I just remembered that would be a really bad idea. (In fact, general advice for all here: don’t get in a fight with Stan.)

    Coulter is nuttier than Littlejohn, who’s just a rather sad man. Widdecombe is a more interesting variety of nutcase, and gets perpetual credit for her “something of the night” line…

  17. Stan says:

    Melissa, I humbly withdraw my previous besmirching of your panties. I realise that it was in fact Danimal who actually brought them into the argument in the first place. And to answer your question, yes, the mention of panties generally does confuse me. Or at least, mildly distracts.

    With respect to Ann Coulter, I’d certainly take her over, say, a candlelight dinner with Richard Littlejohn (her probably equivalent over here) anyway. Although I may actually prefer to take Anne Widdecombe out for a meal as she loses in the asthetic stakes (just) but would probably make much better conversation.

    The WYLD STALLIONS bit totally lost me. To be honest, I’m not entirely sure what a “kegger” is either but I believe I can guess and I recall Delta Epsilon is something to do with calculus. But since you already have a stuttering English fop already, I feel somewhat redundant.

    I hope this has cleared things up.

  18. Danimal says:

    Nope, failed to get the WYLD STALLIONS bit and focused too hard on the “ponder the lack of ladyfolk” bit. Sorry.

    The Dude abides.

  19. Timothy says:

    I have no fucking idea.

  20. Tyler says:

    What the hell were we talking about again?

  21. Timothy says:

    Isn’t it Delta Upsilon? Stay away from that place, Greg McNeil might be about.

  22. melissa says:

    To contrast defense with gratuitous panty mention:

    “tee hee! My panties are white with pink polka-dots! Wanna see? Are you going to the Delta Epsilon kegger tonight? (giggle giggle)”

    Ya follow me, Stan? Or does the sole mention of “panties” just confuse you?

  23. Timothy says:

    I think Sir Danimal did not get the Wyld Stallions bit. As far as my panties, well, I’m flying free and loving it.

  24. melissa says:

    Reference was not gratuitous. I didn’t bring up my “panties”; I was defending them.

    And I didn’t complain about people looking down my shirt. I merely pointed it out as an undesirable action of a certain members of a group…not a generalization mind you, but from actual experience…in comparison to the company of Ann Coulter.

  25. Stan says:

    See, you complain about people looking down your shirt, then you make gratuitous references to your panties. I call foul.

  26. melissa says:

    Dude! Dan! My panties aren’t in a bunch! Take a joke. Dude. Seriously. Are yours?

  27. Timothy says:

    Mel: I do what I can.

  28. Timothy says:

    Dude, dude, like seriously, dude.

  29. Danimal says:

    Dude, Melissa, I think “dude” has become unisex in certain contexts, including the way Tim used it here. Don’t get your panties in a bunch. (Also unisex!)

  30. Melissa says:

    Dude. I’m not a dude. WYLD STALLIONS! (followed by lame-ass air guitar movements)
    Bill, my friend,
    This has been a most excellent adventure.

    And you ponder the lack of ladyfolk ’round these parts.

    Honestly, Tim, your comments are the highlight of my day.

  31. Timothy says:

    Dude, because the dark side is totally cooler.

  32. Melissa says:

    Timothy. Why the bitterness? Why the anger?

    Yoda : “Anger, fear, aggression. The dark side are they.”

  33. Olly says:

    Stan: “insufferable enlightenment” is good. I’m stealing that, if you don’t mind.

  34. Olly says:

    Belated response to JPC:

    I don’t think Moore is the only well-known example of a “Lefty propagandist” – Chomsky is the first example that springs to mind. But the tolerance extended towards Moore reflects badly on everyone who indulges in it, just as people on the right stray closer to raving lunacy the more they take up with the likes of Coulter.

    The difference, for me personally, is that I never considered myself right-wing, so I don’t feel responsible for lunatics on that side. It wasn’t that people like Moore suddenly came along and chased me off my turf – I just got a bit older and started noticing them. That done, though, I cannot truck with these people. Doesn’t mean I’ve done a reverse David Brock; I just lost my innocence, and now I’m apparently bitter about it.

  35. Timothy says:

    Fine: Who says it’s only the old one’s who’d talk to your chest?

    Is that better? Does that make the late-to-class-ness acceptable? No? Goddamn, tough crowd.

  36. melissa says:

    what, no sharply barbed witty retort? I didn’t make myself late to class for a measly “point taken.”

  37. Timothy says:

    Point taken.

  38. Melissa says:

    Timothy: Ann Coulter vs. Myriad Old White Men. All I’m saying is that, if given a choice,I would much prefer to spend an afternoon/evening of rousing political comradery with Ann Coulter due to 1) aesthetic value, and 2)the probability of Ann Coulter talking to my chest and trying to look down my shirt while attempting to give me fatherly “embraces” in the name of remotely shared political values is low.

    Very low.

  39. Stan says:

    Hey, why write to one when a well-chosen comment here I could potentially influence the entire OC staff. Vote Nader. England expects.

    FWIW, I think the Clark County thing sort-of sums up the entire Guardian readership in a single episode. Hilarious and tragic at the same time. The sort of good-natured patronising arrogance that the poor residents of Clark County don’t quite know what they’re doing, and need the warm loving care of the Guardian readership to bathe them in the cosy glow of insufferable enlightenment.

  40. Danimal says:

    Melissa said:

    “Ann Coulter is ‘hot’ . . . I am quite glad to have a ‘very attractive woman’ under the age of 60 supporting conservatives . . . It saves me from having to socialize with old white men.”

    (Internal quote marks mine.)

    So . . . you socialize with Ann Coulter?

    If so: why?

  41. Timothy says:

    And The OC is a Young Attractive Single Conservatives group, quite sparse on the ladyfolk I might add.

  42. Timothy says:

    Hot if you’re into skeletor.

  43. melissa says:

    Ann Coulter is hot. Although she may be (to some)a raving lunatic, I am quite glad to have a very attractive woman under the age of 60 supporting conservatives, lunatic though she may be. It saves me from having to socialize with old white men. Long story short, I had a bad experience at the Lane County Fair. I have been trying to convince my sister to join me in starting a Young Attractive Single Conservatives Group for some time. Too late…

  44. JPC says:

    Regards the “nuanced view” the Left is supposed to have:

    Isn’t using Michael Moore as a counterexample a bit of a straw man argument? He’s just the only well-known example of a Lefty propagandist. It’s not like we’re going around claiming all right wingers (Libertarian or not) are raving lunatics because Ann Coulter happens to fit that description (although she does manage a mean pie-dodge, in high heels no less).

  45. Timothy says:

    Must…resist…limey…influence…cannot…in good conscience…vote…Kerry….

  46. Danimal says:

    Come on, Tim, how could a letter from another country telling you how to vote possibly backfire?

  47. Timothy says:

    Except, if they all have the tone of that Dawkins piece of crap, it’s likely to backfire.

  48. Olly says:

    I’m absolutely certain that I do.

    So, Stan, are you one of these people sending patronizing letters to residents of Clark County, OH trying to influence their vote for the president? If not, I think you should start. It’s like adopting an orphan in Somalia.

  49. Stan says:

    So did you give up being left wing when you discovered that there wasn’t one to speak of in your chosen country? I’m sort-of amazed that Kerry, with his record is painted as a left-wing liberal. Call it transatlantic myopism.

    If it helps, I think you may have a nostalgia-tinged view of the left or politics in England at the moment.

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