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Headlines Of Splendor Department

Alternate headlines for this story gratefully accepted. My submission:

Control of actions central in walking down flight of stairs

Control of actions central in going to the shops

Control of actions central in tying of shoelaces

And so on.

  1. Stan says:

    Control of actions central in “Control of actions” headline suggestions such as this.

  2. ko says:

    Control of actions central in achieving inner peace, motionlessness

  3. Danimal says:

    Control of actions central in prison

  4. Timothy says:

    Control of actions central in not crapping one’s pants.

  5. Danimal says:

    Control of actions central in the swimming pool

  6. Anonymous says:

    Also, “sexual relations” in the sub head? Paging Bill Clinton!

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