Headlines Of Splendor Department
Alternate headlines for this story gratefully accepted. My submission:
Control of actions central in walking down flight of stairs
Control of actions central in going to the shops
Control of actions central in tying of shoelaces
And so on.
Control of actions central in “Control of actions” headline suggestions such as this.
Control of actions central in achieving inner peace, motionlessness
Control of actions central in prison
Control of actions central in not crapping one’s pants.
Control of actions central in the swimming pool
Also, “sexual relations” in the sub head? Paging Bill Clinton!