Unpermitted discharge, wild-eyed fidgeting, as a physician. News roundup Oct. 18, 2010
Public affairs news:
- Democracy questions: The Emerald’s Ian Geronimo interviews U.S. House candidates Peter DeFazio and Art Robinson, which is better on video. Money question: Ducks or Beavers? DeFazio: Ducks. Robinson: wild-eyed fidgeting. (Emerald)
- Handcuffs: There will be a hearing tonight on whether DPS should be able to arrest people. (KEZI)
- Weather: Global warming. The world haz it. It is a problem. Some people came to talk about it this weekend and a bunch of people went to see that happen.* (Emerald)
- Discharges: An environmental group has filed suit alleging that a Eugene company illegally dumps unfiltered water in the Willamette. The group says it represents people who “have been, are being, and will be adversely affected by defendant’s unpermitted discharges.” Jokes come cheap on that one. (Register-Guard)
- Honesty: The Oregonian catches U.S. Rep. Kurt Schrader in a lie about the Troubled Asset Relief Program.
Opinion:
- Emerald columnist Thomas Kyle-Milward presents an important biological query through a political allegory: ants and lions, why do they fight?
- I think the Emerald’s occasional scribbler Andrew Hitz is saying cigarettes can make you look cool.
- Editorials: The Emerald thinks the ASUO’s ad-hoc committees are a waste of time. Forest. Trees. Seeing one and not the other.
- Letters: People writing in to the Oregonian have things to say about UO tuition, namely “let’s have a class war.” The Guard’s inbox contains the usual suspicious praise for politicians, using phrases such as “as a physician” and “viable candidate.”
- Movies: Occasional Emerald scribbler Chris Lenci found it possible to describe the new Jackass movie with generically positive adjectives.
Scene:
Sports:
- I don’t know if you know this, but Oregon Football is so good it doesn’t even have to play to be proclaimed officially the best thing ever for a whole week. The Register-Guard also writes about this. But the BCS standings are still disagreeing, presumably because they are no fun.
- Oregon Volleyball made the Hated Beavers look foolish. This was the last Civil War game ever at McArthur Court. Not swelling with pride? CARE MORE ABOUT SPORTS!
- Oregon Running-a-Very-Long-Way won, and got second, and got third, and won the team tournament, and just made every one of the hated rivals who decided they could out-run-a-very-long-way Oregon look somewhat foolish for trying.
- OREGON SOCCER UNABLE TO GET FIRST WIN IN LEAGUE!!!!! HATED BRUINS AND HATED TROJANS TAKE POINTS OFF DUCKS AT PAPE! DUCKS COME AWAY FROM HATED TROJANS GAME WITH POINT, STILL DISAPPOINTED!
* Fun fact: If your web browser cuts off the Emerald‘s headline the same way it cuts it off for me, it says “Global war…,” which, if you react to global war as I do, makes you very alarmed every time you see it. Not that global warming isn’t also alarming. It is, just not in an “am I going to die tonight, in my bed?” kind of way.
So help me God, if I open up the ODE and see a headline with the word “hipster” in it one more time, I am going to slap the hipster out of Mr. Hitz and add gears and a brake to his bike.