In a list about something or other (to be honest I didn’t read the blog post, I was just skimming. He’s lucky he got that) former ODE opinion columnist Truman Capps tried to sneak in a little rabbit punch.

While I wholeheartedly agree that both the Democrats and Republicans are full of shit, I’ve noticed that some Libertarians can be awfully self-righteous about how they and they alone recognize the truth and beauty of the free market and individual liberties.

“Some libertarians” Truman? Maybe it’s time to sack up and just call us by name, hmm?

You’ve fully committed to that Craig Sager haircut of yours, you’ve told everyone on campus that “guns are yucky”–you might as well complete the trifecta of manliness and call us out. Or maybe you’ve learned a lesson by watching Kai Davis get his ass handed to him?

On second thought, good move not calling us out by name. You shouldn’t fuck with people who buy their ink by the barrel.

Radley Balko calls this “the most thorough, clear elucidation of the problems with U.S. health care” that he’s seen. I’m inclined to agree, even if I don’t necessarily buy the author’s prescriptions (no pun intended) for fixing the problem.

It’s a long read, but well worth it and a far cry from the usual “death panels” and “racists” bilge that the right and left have been tossing about in the last few weeks.

It’s been forty years. No one cares. The world does not — and never did — revolve around you. So please scurry off and die already, and take your self-serving myth-making right along with you.

Thanks,

Everyone else.

Only you can prevent me from raping your ears.

Mrs. Opportunity is at it again, causing mounds upon mounds of soundbytes to ooze from various radio and television news talkshow hosts. It’s already abundantly clear that no one should ever listen to what this woman says, but somehow she still gains national spotlight because she has, yet again, failed to understand a fundamental element of national policy.

Now the last few days I’ve had to watch cable news shows, Jon Stewart and others absolutely destroy Palin’s asinine remarks from her Facebook page. Why hasn’t anyone taken then hint yet that Palin is, by all accounts, meaningless?

Her contribution to American politics was, at best, limited during her VP run. Now that she’s resigned from her Governor’s post she has absolutely zero legitimacy as a nationally recognized commentator on American politics. Let’s put this out there one more time: Sarah Palin is not an important national figure. She’s a joke, a lame-duck Governor from a state with about as many people as Portland.

For people like Sean Hannity and Jon Stewart to be discussing her opinion shows their inability to judge what and who should be relevant on a national scale.

With the Obama Administration on its last legs after less than a year, having spent what was left of its political capital in a savage, blood-soaked gladiator brawl over questions about the President’s place of birth and in the wake of ex-Alaska Governor Sarah Palin’s sudden resignation from office and her subsequent abortive foray into avant-garde poetry, rumors abounded that the Oregon Commentator’s own Sudsy O’Sullivan was already preparing for an easy cruise through the 2012 election.

Sadly, it seems that Sudsy’s Presidential ambitions have been stymied before the beloved anthropomorphic mug of beer’s campaign even got of the ground with the revelation that Mr. O’Sullivan was, in fact, born in Kenya.

Via operatives planted at the headquarters of the “Birther” movement, the Oregon Commentator has obtained a copy of Sudsy O’Sullivan’s birth certificate, which we have reproduced below:

Despite torpedoing President Obama’s entire Administration and forcing the nascent O’Sullivan campaign to scuttle its plans for a 2012 run, one of the leading lights in the so-called “Birther” movement, the amusingly named Orly Taitz, has praised California Governor Arnold Schwartzenegger, saying:

Governor Schwartzenegger has done a fantastic job here in California. The state has never been in better shape. People poke a lot of fun at Governor Schwartzenegger’s so-called “accent”, but as far as I’m concerned, he’s a patriotic American, through and through.

In fact, we’re hoping he’ll consider a 2012 Presidential run because we’re confident he has a good shot at the Oval Office. At least he’s demonstrated that he knows how to run a responsible budget, unlike that stinking foreigner who’s been treating America like Occupied Poland since January 20th…

First against the wall.