The Atlantic has a fine old time detailing the myriad ways in which Bobby Fischer has comprehensively lost the plot.

Seems the mainstream media are cleaning up the speech in Kurt Cobain’s journals. One has to wonder how much smack he injected before writing that Jimmy Carter was a “good, honest, smart man.” However, Cobain did remain lucid enough to recall that Carter, “liked peanuts.”

(credit to www.andrewsullivan.com for the link)

The truth about George W. Bush, Saddam Hussein and RJR Nabisco is more shocking than anyone could have known. Until now…

Mad magazine takes on the Onion. This is like watching Jim Belushi try to pick a fight with Jet Li. To make the analogy precise: a bitter, bitter Jim Belushi, in an alternate universe where Jet Li – perhaps starring in a family-oriented sitcom called “According to Jet” – is enjoying much better ratings.

The Emerald today takes a stand against the Eugene City Council making individuals use public restrooms according to which genitalia they have. According to Kleckner and Company the city council should make restrooms unisex or some nonsense. The story is here.

The city of Monmouth, home of Western Oregon University, passed a bill on election day that struck down the 140-year-old law that prohibited the sale of alcohol within the city.

According to the decendants of the university’s founder, an evangelical minister, this means the ownership of the school falls into their hands. Whether or not this actually happens is up to some extensive historical research and legal wrangling, but it’s still intriguing.

It’s nice to see that alcohol is not only limited to making you stronger than everyone in the world, irresistable to the opposite sex, and as witty and charming as Jesus Christ, but it also inadvertently grants you lots and lots of land.

Bill,

I loves ya kid, but it’s time to move on. In real UO news James Britt, former ASUO legal services and Commentator contributor is the brother of one of the terrorists arrested in PDX. Discuss amongst yourselves.

XOXO,

Weminghay

Class of ’98

In news from earlier in the day, Emerald princess-in-residence ‘Judge’ Julie Lauderbaugh coins the phrase “body image genocide.”

http://www.dailyemerald.com/vnews/display.v/ART/2002/11/18/3dd919ce0d40a

If the subject matter interests you, just go find the Reuters article Julie is reacting incoherently to. In the meantime, perhaps somebody with more writing ability could better explain the beauty pagent/death penalty equivalency.

As of a few hours ago, several Portland-area members of an Oregon ELF cell have been apprehended and charged with arson. Tre Arrow, the former Portland congressional candidate and protesting ledge-sitter, is likewise implicated and a fugitive from justice tonight.http://www.katu.com/news/story.asp?ID=51895

What is it with Portland and terrorism?

NRO’s David Frum has an interesting piece on Woodward’s new book, and why it should be reason to fire Sec/State Colin Powell. You think Woodward calls Powell Deep Throat in their off hours?

http://www.nationalreview.com/frum/diary111802.asp

Bret

An end to the oppressive Tyranny of SUVs is surely at hand.

If you don’t have NYT access, use the following…

Login: commiehater

Password: sudsy

I hear that in Scotland they play our brand of football — the American type — Austria, too. I submit that Fife concentrate on being drafted by the Glasgow Claymores.

At this rate, Bellotti must be thinking hard about giving Collins another shot. Or Vossmeyer. (Everybody, now: Who?) I’d wager even the Cincinnati Bengals know better.

Aghast,

WWB

Washington, DC

P.S. If you need any help with the office move, UO’s Matt Beutler can probably be bought with booze. Good luck on the third floor, everyone.

Let’s start this off with a fine article by The Onion. I’m sure this scenario is not uncommon at student “collectives” at the UofO.