. . . totally didn’t happen, because there was no quorum. Quorum for the Summer Senate is 2/3 of seated members, of which there are 11. As far as I know, nobody has resigned from Summer Senate so far (not with public notice anyway), so that means they would have had to have eight people show up. They had four. Pretty much a fail, in my book.

Although they didn’t have an official meeting, they did give some updates:

1. According to Summer Senate Chair Kaitlyn Lange, there is no longer a Finance Coordinator in the ASUO Executive. This must mean that Kamal Ararso has left the position, but the ASUO hasn’t posted a hiring notice for the position yet. It’s KIND OF an important job, so they should probably get on that.
2. The ASUO is working on hiring their Sustainability Coordinator. They are waiting on approval from Human Resources at the moment, but once that approval is received, they will be opening up the position for a regional search.
3. And for by far the most interesting of updates, the ASUO office was the victim of what Ben Eckstein called “criminal mischief 3.” Some amazing person pinned seven (or so) insects to the ASUO Programs billboard, all science lab dissection style. Apparently there were six flies and a cockroach. Nicole Nelson was purported to have said, “There is a science dedicated to the study of bugs, the programs billboard is not the place for such studies.”

So far, I have not seen any output from Summer Senate. They have committees, they’re supposed to be doing things, but they certainly haven’t shown any of it off. Hell, they can’t even get a quorum of members to come to a monthly meeting. I absolutely cannot believe that they tried to give themselves stipends. Thank goodness that didn’t end up happening.

I think it’s about time to start the ASUO Senator resignation pool. I’m going to go with 6 senators, although that estimate is quite conservative. Anyone else?

The Oregonian is currently doing a series on the budget crisis in Oregon, including this quick article from Saturday’s paper about eliminating the OLCC. Essentially, the article lists the pros and cons of privatization. The most interesting part:

2009-2011 budget: $134 million, generated by sales, fees and fines. Here’s the breakdown: $9.7 million, 67 employees for purchasing, wholesale and support; $18.3 million, 104 employees for public safety; $14.9 million, 59 employees for support services, which includes administration; $82.3 million agents’ compensation and $8.9 million merchant fees. OLCC returned $172 million in proceeds to state and local government for the 2009-2010 fiscal year.

In other OLCC news, Oregon Senator Floyd Prozanski (D-4) is proposing a change to the legislation preventing Oregon homebrewers from consuming their product outside of their homes, an issue that came to head this year (haha, get it?) when the DOJ interpreted the existing legislation regarding the consumption of homebrewed alcohol to mean the end of the homebrew competition at the Oregon State Fair. The legislation is being drafted, and will likely be considered in January, when the legislature gets to start having fun with the state budget again:

Christie Scott, a spokeswoman for the Oregon Liquor Control Commission, said her agency has looked into numerous ways to work within the confines of the law while allowing home brewers to continue sharing their beers and ales beyond where they were brewed. But none of the possible solutions have been practical.

…

“The only real solution to getting this change is changing the statute, and that is exactly what we’re working with Sen. Prozanski on,” Scott said.

Prozanski said he’s taking the lead in the Legislature on finding a solution.

…

Prozanski said it will spell out clearly what Oregonians can and cannot do with the beer, wine, hard cider and other home-made alcohol they produce. The goal is to return to the way such beverages could be enjoyed before the Justice Department’s new interpretation of the law.

“What’s been going on for decades should be permitted,” Prozanski said.

All this anti-OLCC press will certainly be a motivating factor in the midterm elections coming up in the fall, specifically since Republican candidate Chris Dudley is making it a campaign issue.

This is a story about Julie Murphy.

Julie Murphy is from Oregon City. She was inspired to become an entrepreneur by one of her favorite television shows. She and her mother traveled up to Portland, to set up shop in a more lucrative location — Alberta Street. As is often the case, Julie was shut down by the authorities and their “heavy handed regulations.”

The authorization in question is a $120 temporary restaurant license. The business in question is a lemonade stand. Julie Murphy is seven years old.

Even before her daughter had finished making the first batch of lemonade, a man walked up to buy a 50-cent cup.

“They wanted to support a little 7-year-old to earn a little extra summer loot,” she said. “People know what’s going on.”

Even so, Julie was careful about making the lemonade, cleaning her hands with hand sanitizer, using a scoop for the bagged ice and keeping everything covered when it wasn’t in use, Fife said.

Everything was going great for Julie and her mom . . . until the authorities showed up.

After 20 minutes, a “lady with a clipboard” came over and asked for their license. When Fife explained they didn’t have one, the woman told them they would need to leave or possibly face a $500 fine.

Surprised, Fife started to pack up. The people staffing the booths next to them encouraged the two to stay, telling them the inspectors had no right to kick them out of the neighborhood gathering. They also suggested that they give away the lemonade and accept donations instead and one of them made an announcement to the crowd to support the lemonade stand.

That’s when business really picked up — and two inspectors came back, Fife said. Julie started crying, while her mother packed up and others confronted the inspectors. “It was a very big scene,” Fife said.

Technically, any lemonade stand — even one on your front lawn — must be licensed under state law, said Eric Pippert, the food-borne illness prevention program manager for the state’s public health division. But county inspectors are unlikely to go after kids selling lemonade on their front lawn unless, he conceded, their front lawn happens to be on Alberta Street during Last Thursday.

If Lemonade Stand taught me anything, it was the basics of capitalism and entrepreneurship. I learned how to build a business from scratch, keep track of inventory and finances, and understand what kept me afloat. I even opened a lemonade stand in my apartment complex in Hong Kong at age eight, to see what all the fuss is about.

While safety concerns are legitimate, this was a responsible seven-year-old with her mother on hand. Laws are laws, and health regulations are realistic, but . . . seriously Oregon?

I leave you with this, from Julie Murphy’s mother:

While Fife said she does see the need for some food safety regulation, she thinks the county went too far in trying to control events as unstructured as Last Thursday.

“As far as Last Thursday is concerned, people know when they are coming there that it’s more or less a free-for-all,” she said. “It’s gotten to the point where they need to be in all of our decisions. They don’t trust us to make good choices on our own.”

The DOJ has released their opinion on the OLCC homebrew issue from a couple weeks ago, and if you were looking forward to a beer or wine competition at this year’s state fair, you are sure to be disappointed:

In a legal opinion made public today, the Oregon Department of Justice has concluded that amateur home brewers lose their exemption under state law that they be licensed as a manufacturer when their home brewed alcoholic liquor is consumed outside the home.

The law in question is ORS 471.403(1), which states:

No person shall brew, ferment, distill, blend or rectify any alcoholic liquor unless licensed so to do by the Oregon Liquor Control Commission. However, the Liquor Control Act does not apply to the making or keeping of naturally fermented wines and fruit juices or beer in the home, for home consumption and not for sale.

Due to the DOJ’s lack of transparency, I’m having trouble finding the actual memo. Beernews.org has some more on the story, including some clarification on how the issue came to light. Also see this article from the Oregonian.

The law is vague, and was born out of a post-Prohibition era attempt to regulate the newly-legal booze flow. Legislators and law enforcers wanted to keep a close watch on the consumption of alcohol. They wanted to regulate it harshly. It isn’t that much different than what’s happening now, right? The OLCC wants to manage every drop of hard alcohol in this state, to, as they put it, prevent over-saturation. They claim to have the best interests of Oregonians in mind, all the while raking in $172 million for the state, most of which goes into the general fund. And let’s not forget last year’s Bend OLCC controversy.

A government organization with ultimate power over a popular commodity is dangerous, self-serving and a horrible precedent for the state of Oregon to set. Popular opinion is turning, though, was more and more people have been expressing their opinions. Maybe the revolution is starting. Maybe Oregonians are going to start fighting back, taking what’s been rightfully ours all along.

I don’t know, maybe I’m just drunk.

Rush Limbaugh enjoyed this fourth wedding last Friday in a ceremony I would have paid to get into.  Guests included Karl Rove, Rudy Giuliani, Sean Hannity, GOP analyst Mary Matalin, Fred Thompson, and, according to People, Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas. I hope they played the wedding game where everyone has to shove cash down the bride’s dress.

Even more unusual was the wedding singer, a Mr. Elton John, whose outspoken support of gay rights and gay civil-union stands in sharp contrast to almost everything Limbaugh has ever said. At least Elton was well paid for his services, raking in $1 million for his matrimonial performance.

http://larrykinglive.blogs.cnn.com/2010/06/07/elton-john-performs-at-rush-limbaughs-wedding/

Last night, the ASUO Student Senate held a special meeting with the purpose of electing a Summer Senate Chair and Vice Chair. Unfortunately, senate meetings never turn out to be as short as we would hope them to be, especially when nobody knows what the hell is going on. But hey, it’s the ASUO Senate. What was I expecting?

The Senate made two monumentally stupid funding decisions last night. The first of which was to allow ASUO fee-funded group Dance Oregon to move their remaining funds into a line item called “Student Dance Concert and Research.” Dance Oregon uses this line item to grant students money to go to summer dance classes and conferences around the world. Dance students can apply to Dance Oregon to receive a grant, and they can essentially use that money to pay for whatever they want for their trip.

This is ridiculous for a number of reasons. First of all, the justification for allowing the group to move money into this line item was that the line item existed in the first place. “Student Dance Concert and Research” is a pretty vague name for a line item, and when PFC approves budgets, they don’t always go line by line. Something like “Scholarships” or “Going on a trip on the student dime” would have been more appropriate.

Second of all, YOU’RE GIVING MONEY TO STUDENTS FOR SCHOLARSHIPS! These students can use the funds for whatever “workshop” or “seminar” or WHATEVER they intend to go on! There is no ASUO oversight there, there is no accountability at all. For a bunch of people who claim themselves to be fiscally responsible, that’s not very responsible.

The other funding decision was definitely the more egregious of the two: the ASUO Senate voted, for the first time in a long time, to give themselves stipends over the summer. That’s right. Senate evaded the stipend model to give themselves money for a job that hasn’t been paid in at least the last five years, potentially longer.

In order to work around the “inconvenience” of a fiscal year that ends on June 30th, Senate approved a surplus request (FOR THEMSELVES, might I add) for $600, even though the total amount to pay the Summer Senate will be $1800 ($50/person/month, $75/person/month for chair and vice-chair). The Summer Senate will then have to allocate themselves money over the summer to pay their stipends.

Just to clarify, Summer Senate does not have the same luxuries as the full body does the rest of the year. They don’t have hundreds of thousands of dollars to allocate — they have $5000 for the whole summer. That money is supposed to be used for emergencies, if a student group is in desperate need of money for a summer event or some other cost incurred. If Summer Senate does in fact allocate themselves the remaining $1200 for stipends, they will be sucking up almost a quarter of those summer funds. And that money will go right into their pockets.

The rest of the meeting was as good as it could be, with everyone rushing to get things done so they could get out of there. The body lost quorum a couple of times, which was thoroughly entertaining. Sen. Kaitlyn Lange (5 – EMU Board) was elected as Summer Senate Chair and Sen. Zachary Stark-MacMillan (16 – General Science) was elected as Summer Senate Vice Chair. Apparently Sen. Jeremy Blanchard (10 – DFC) has a long list of rules changes he wants to pound out over the summer. And the whole Summer Senate wants to work on projects outside of funding, because, y’know, the ASUO Executive gets to.

Speaking of the Executive, they did get through a number of their appointments before Senate adjourned early. Each of the appointments was thoroughly coached by President Rousseau and Political Director Robert D’Andrea, as indicated by the number of times “fiscal responsibility” and “viewpoint neutrality” came up unprovoked. From what I’ve seen so far, Robert’s tactic is just to coach people on how to avoid answering a question. Amelie certainly does it, but more on that later. Senate confirmed appointments to the Athletics and Contracts Finance Committee, EMU Board, and also confirmed an Elections Coordinator, William Price. He had a well-rehearsed speech, he apparently has had no involvement in the ASUO thus far, and will probably make a pretty good Elections Coordinator. I mean, as good as an Elections Coordinator can be. Especially with D’Andrea breathing down his neck creepily all the time.

So, that’s the last Senate meeting of Spring 2010. I’ll be covering the sure-to-be-sneaky activities over the summer as well, so stay tuned to the OC for your weekly entertainment.

I said I’d make some commentary on Rousseau’s executive staff hires, and I will. But first, read Tomchak’s article about the fact that ROBERT D’ANDREA IS AMELIE’S BOYFRIEND. Hate to say I told you so . . .

So, ultimately, I don’t have too many problems with Amelie’s choices of staff hires. You know, except for Robert. The only concern I have is the appointments of Kelsey Jarone and Alexis White to Gender and Sexual Diversity Advocate and Multicultural Advocate, respectively. Both of these individuals are up for a position on the Programs Finance Committee, the group that determines funding for ASUO student groups. If one of them receives that PFC position (Programs Representative, for those playing along at home), not only would it create a conflict of interest, but it would likely be too time consuming of a position to maintain both. Students are allowed to hold one elected and one appointed position, but since both positions would be appointed, they would probably have to choose. On the other hand, one position was appointed by the ASUO Executive and the other would be appointed by the Programs Council, so I’m not sure on the logistics of that.

Kamal Ararso, Finance Coordinator, was chair of the Programs Finance Committee this last year and secured PFC’s budget benchmark at .81%. This means that the total budget of the PFC only increased .81% from the year prior, as opposed to the 5.34% benchmark for the 08-09 PFC. I certainly considered this a victory, and Kamal’s diligence and mathematical and budget competence will lend well to the position.

Sinjin Carey, one of Amelie’s campaign managers, should be a good Programs Administrator. He has experience with programs and seems to be very detail oriented, so he will probably do well in that position. It’s a hard job — just ask Emma Kallaway.

I don’t know most of the other hires. Do any of you have any thoughts?

So today there was a copy of the Siren flopping about on the office floor and I picked it up to spit my gum out and instead started perusing through it. Not saying I enjoyed it much, but on page 30 a DO-IT-YOURSELF cutout appeared….

This specifically.

So being the curious cat I am, I built it and ended up with this…

So now I have one question… WTF SIREN?

What is it? It looks like it’s supposed to hold index cards but why, of all awesome cutouts you could have done, would you do this crap? Someone told me it was a tampon holder. I still don’t know. Can someone please tell me WTF this is?

I’m specifically talking to you, Siren…

This is probably the only thing I’m going to write on this blog about the Pacifica Forum or those affiliated for the rest of the time I’m a part of the OC.

I am a firm believer that if you leave the Pacifica Forum protesters alone, they’ll continue to meet on campus in a small room, and nobody will even know they exist. Like before. Pacifica Forum protesters talk about how having the Pacifica Forum on campus will bring those with similar views to the UO, but until the protesters made a big fuss, most people didn’t know that PF even existed on our campus. The large-scale media attention that followed served to create the whole notion that individuals would flock to the UO campus because they sympathized with PF’s views. The protesters actually created more of the problem that they were — and still are — trying to mitigate.

Additionally, isn’t Orval Etter like, really really old? Isn’t he the only reason that PF are continuing to meet on campus? Not to be rude/mean/insensitive, but when Mr. Etter is no longer with us, won’t PF no longer meet on campus? And isn’t that likely to happen kind of soon?

Anyway, I really think talking about this is bringing more attention to the issue. The Ol’ Dirty opinion desk wrote an open letter to Pacifica Forum protesters yesterday, and I thought it was spot on:

But after six months of protesting, it’s time to face the facts — the Forum isn’t leaving the University or disbanding anytime soon. The Forum has the right to meet on University property because its founder, Orval Etter, is a professor emeritus. The Forum’s right to free speech is protected by the First Amendment, even though the Southern Poverty Law Center has labeled the Forum a hate group.

…
[T]ry finding a new cause to protest. The Forum is a small, isolated group that isn’t growing a following and isn’t going to change its ways. Protesting the Forum is starting to seem like a lost cause, for a while at least, and there are thousands of other causes begging for awareness. Try directing your efforts to larger-scale projects that will reach a larger audience and engage more of the University community.

There is good work to be done, and lots of screwed up things to be protested. Move on, friends.

Alright, kids. Have fun with this one (emphasis added to maximize hilarity):

Eugene police arrested a woman Friday at the Pacifica Forum meeting on campus, while others were given citations after protesters deployed a stink bomb to disrupt the meeting.

. . .

The Emerald was unable to confirm how many protesters received citations on Friday. DPS spokesperson Sgt. Adam Lillengreen declined to comment, saying the report first had to be released at its scheduled time later today. Protesters who were given citations are not allowed back onto University property for 18 months.

. . .

Black Tea Society spokesperson Damage, who declined to give his legal name out of safety concerns, refused to give names of the other protesters who received citations. Damage also said he thought six Black Tea Society members were issued citations on Friday.

First of all, let me say that today’s Ol’ Dirty is full of gems. I suggest you pick up a copy.

I’m here today, however, to talk to you about one of the most absurd acts of protest I’ve ever heard. Last night’s ASUO Senate meeting did not carry on as planned, due to lack of quorum (to be a legitimate voting body, the ASUO Senate needs two thirds of its members present, or 13 people). They were planning on having exactly quorum, until Sen. Jairo Castañeda failed to show up without notification. His reason? I’ll let Tomchak’s article speak for itself:

Castaneda said his absence was a deliberate attempt to make a statement about an incident at the April 28 Senate meeting.

There, the Senate gave the club women’s lacrosse team funding to go to its national championship in Scottsdale, Ariz. While voting for the funding, Sen. Ben Fisher told members of the team to “bring your birth certificates,” a reference to Arizona’s recently passed immigration law, which critics have said will lead to racial profiling.

“I believe that was highly disrespectful,” Castaneda said after the comment, at which many senators and audience members laughed.

Fisher said the comment was intended as a joke criticizing the Arizona law, which he, like Castaneda, opposes.

“The whole reason for me not going to tonight’s Senate meeting was not Fisher,” Castaneda said. “It was the climate that allows things like this to be said.”

The best part of all of this is the only group who had time constraints on receiving money was the Multicultural Center, a group largely considered to be the greatest advocate for marginalized communities:

The only group seeking funding whose members said it needs the money before the Senate’s next meeting was the Multicultural Center, looking to pay for two speakers coming May 12 and 13. [Senate President Nick] Gower told the MCC’s representatives the Senate would hold a special meeting for them if necessary.

“Unfortunately, a few senators who don’t want to represent their constituents are the reason we don’t have quorum tonight,” Gower said.

Sen. Gower really hit the nail on the head there. You want to talk about respect, Sen. Castañeda? Not allowing a public meeting to go on as scheduled and postponing potential funding for at least seven student groups is, to quote Sen. Ben Fisher, “stupid,” as well as one of the most asinine forms of protest I’ve heard of. You are an ASUO Senator, and it is your job to show up to your meetings and dole out student money. So do your job, or get the fuck out.

P.S. I saw you last night at the bars while you were supposed to be serving the student body. Real classy.

In a guest commentary in the ODE, Cimmeron Gillespie railed against fiscal conservatism as a means to amplify the current funding issues of sexual abuse programs here at the UO.

Of course, this is all very well and good, if it weren’t for gems we’ve been expecting to hear from Gillespie for some time like, “The election of any group who calls for increased scrutiny of the incidental fee or ASUO funds doesn’t understand that there is already huge bureaucracy and oversight.”

The rest of Gillespie’s column goes on as a thinly veiled attack against Alex McCafferty’s presidential bid. Of course, McCafferty has been chair of the ACFC twice and Senate president, meaning he fully understands the ASUO funding process. Or rather, “he speaks with some authority.”

In a conversation with former OC publisher Guy Simmons, he told me this, “You know why this magazine–a conservative voice–is the most popular magazine on this liberal campus? Because everyone thinks governmental waste is bad. Period.”

Well, everyone except for one member of the “anarchist collective”.

Last night saw the Winter Olympics come to an end. America won the overall medal count and host country  Canada won the most gold medals. One victory celebration in general caused an uproar. The Canadian women’s hockey celebrated  their gold medal victory by smoking  cigars and drinking beer.

The International Olympic Committee  was not pleased with the celebration and called in the international hockey committee and the Canadian Olympic International  to inform them they will be investigating the situation. The biggest problem with the celebration according to media outlets is that 18 year old Marie Philip Poulin was photographed drinking beer, 19 is the legal drinking age in British Columbia.

Stories like this just prove that American media has become too sensitive. Poulin scored the only two goals in the gold medal game. She spends most of her time training in Alberta where  the drinking age is 18. Yes, there are different “states” in Canada, they are called provinces or territories,  for all the geographically ignorant. The team won the biggest game of their careers and achieved the highest level of success in women’s hockey. Let them celebrate with some beer.  They did not drink or smoke while spectators were in the arena, give them a break.

If a 18 year old wants to drink a Molson after winning an Olympic gold medal I say let them drink up. It’s an amazing accomplishment that many strive for their whole lives. If that person score the only two goals in the gold medal game, there should be people lining up to buy her a drink. This was a goal oriented successful young woman (pun intended) celebrating with her teammates , not some high school drop out getting drunk by the train tracks.

According to Tomcat over at the Daily Emerald, Diego Hernandez and CAER, the Coalition Against Environmental Racism, has been stamping their feet like insolent children over a recent allocation of EMU office space that didn’t go their way.

A recently vacated office space in the Survival Center was up for grabs, and both CAER and the Alliance of Happy Atheists (AHA) applied for the space. Because of a relationship with ASUO President Emma Kallaway and the Survival Center, CAER didn’t think they really had to, you know, try to get the office space:

“The difference between their applications, CAER co-director Adrien Wilkie said, was that CAER, because of encouragement from Kallaway and the Survival Center to apply for the space, assumed that the Jan. 27 meeting at which an EMU Board subcommittee met to allocate space in the building was a formality.

“Honestly, we went into this thinking we had to apply just for bureaucracy’s sake,” she said. Neither she nor her fellow co-director skipped class to attend.”

(more…)

We at the University of Oregon unfortunately do not have the day off, but if you would like to spend the day wasting time here are some presidential links to wet your whistle.

CNN’s Look into forgettable Presidents.

The top 43 sexiest Presidents according to Nerve.com.

CSM’s Look into the facts of President’s Day.

Teddy being a badass

Feel free to comment on your favorite or sexiest president below. I know there has to be some people that think Taft is sexy.