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Sudsy Wants You to Join the Oregon Commentator

Cultural studies of the Portland metropolitan area

Not having grown up in Oregon, I must admit to often being confused about the differences between the various Portland suburbs. It’s like there’s this secret code Portland-ites know from birth about what it means to be from whichever outlying town.

However, after over three years of grueling study, I think I’m starting to get the hang of it. People from Lake Oswego (or “L.O.”, for the annoying) are rich. People from Portland are respected because they’re actually from Portland and not a crappy suburb. And people from Clackamas are cops who try to meet 13-year-old girls on the internet.

Seriously, a news station caught twelve of these guys in two days. Just imagine how many they’d get if the actual police were trying to catch them. (And not, you know, be them.)

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