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Sudsy Wants You to Join the Oregon Commentator

Alcohol-fuelled bedlam, mayoral noses, rude Chip Kelly gestures. News digest Oct. 19, 2010.

Correction: Originally, this post called the Emerald’s columnist “Hannah Wendel.” Her name is actually JoAnna Wendel. I now feel vaguely senile.

Public affairs news:

  • Handcuffs: It appears the City Council will soon give DPS the power to arrest people. (Emerald, KEZI)
  • Masters and workmen: After failing to sell UO Graduate Teaching Fellows on their June offer of, essentially, nothing, the administration is seeing if increases in wages and benefits and an inclusive hiring process will do the trick. Undoubtedly, this is interrelated with Richard Lariviere’s increases in staff overtime, for which Gov. Ted Kulongoski scolded him, although the Emerald’s Stefan Verbano doesn’t explicitly make that connection. Once again, the Emerald’s Stefan Verbano scoops the Guard on an important UO story, although this one is far denser and more confusing than the masterful one he wrote about financial aid. For those keeping score, that’s three embarrassing defeats he’s meted out to the Guard already this year, and a run of two in as many stories. (Emerald)
  • The opaque: UO Matters’ author is dying to hear what the Oregon University System discussed at its last meeting, and renews his crusade against OUS lawyer Ryan J. Hagemann’s studious refusal to release minutes of OUS meetings.
  • Bedlam news: Faced with the prospect of “alcohol-fuelled bedlam” connected to Thursday night’s Oregon Football-Hated Bruins game, Eugene police are gearing up for an extra night of party patrols. A sample of the apocalyptic hellscape EPD anticipates: “‘I’m praying for bad weather, because that usually helps calm (the madness) down,’ (EPD Capt. Rich) Stronach said.” Note: Unlike the last Guard article on the subject, this one lacks any tips about how to avoid police if you happen to want to use alcohol to induce a bit of bedlam, beyond a sentence that appears to present the patrols as a punitive measure: “The extra patrols will continue until police see a marked decrease in disruptive after-hours activities on Friday and Saturday nights.”(Register-Guard)
  • Dust-eating: The Guard is still catching up with Willamette Week on the Lariviere’s scolding story. (Register-Guard)
  • ASUO money: So, if you thought the mayor of Eugene was too good to dirty herself with the ASUO, with trying to influence its agenda, you were stone dead wrong. Here she tries to persuade the ASUO to fund OSPIRG. (Emerald)
  • The ether: The U.S. government is trying to pass legislation that would warn cellphone users before they get extra charges in their bills. Many UO students, though, are on their parents’ plans, and so don’t care. (Emerald)
  • The slammer: The Emerald’s Ian Geronimo, perhaps with a somewhat cynical perception of what is important to UO students, meditates on the positions incumbent Floyd Prozanski and opponent Marilyn Kittelman’s hold on mandatory minimum sentencing. (Emerald)
  • Charity: A $10 million anonymous gift for OHSU. (Oregonian)


  • The Oregonian joins Kulongoski in scolding Lariviere.
  • Newish Emerald columnist JoAnna Wendel* goes to a cadaver lab, disappointingly taking with her the perception that anything is “way too graphic to recount here.” This is especially disappointing because she does talk about “bisecting a penis.”
  • Letters: The Guard’s mailbag is unexpectedly exciting today, as political candidate Jay Bozievich’s wife scolds the Guard and a letter-writer for criticizing her husband. Meanwhile, County Commissioner Bill Fleenor implicitly calls nearly every politician in the state a “jackass,” but doesn’t have the stones to name names, and frankly would be more authoritative if a political rival wasn’t taking him to court alleging he violated Oregon Public Meetings law.
  • Editorials: The Guard‘s ed. board wants Barack Obama to cough up some timber payments and an improved rail connection for Coos Bay.
  • Skating enthusiast John Boytz wants a new skate park.

Oregon Football is No. 1:

  • Panim et circences: HULIQ’s Dave Masko decides to kill Oregon Football fans’ buzz by using the Ducks’ ranking as an excuse to talk about non-directly-related social issues or some junk. Read Satire X and “The Road to Wigan Pier,” which make the same, extremely valid, point more effectively in the sense that they are neither myopic nor intellectually dishonest, and written by two of the cleverest writers of all time. Do not waste your time with Masko and his anonymous UO student strawman.
  • The Emerald’s Robert Husseman has a different take on the ontological question of football. He writes one of those lovely little pieces of which he is capable, reminding us that it is as arbitrary and cruel as life itself.
  • The Emerald reports that Oregon Football is in a good mood.
  • John Canzano wants Oregon Football to win it all so Chip Kelly can put two fingers up at the BCS.
  • NBC’s John Tamanaha thinks Oregon Football could stay No. 1. ESPN’s Ted Miller thinks Oregon Football will be in the BCS championship. The team’s wide receivers coach says, unsurprisingly, that he likes Oregon Football’s attitude.

Other sports:

  • Oregon Running-a-Very-Long-Way member Anne Kesselring seems like a fun person. I mean, I’m just saying, Anne, Robert Husseman knows my phone number.
  • Oregon Sailing, which has refused to let the Commentator cover it, is doing well.
  1. Responsible Drunk says:

    So glad I’m out of Eugene. Only thing I’ll ever donate $ to is the Mike Belloti mustache statue fund, will you request $ for that or will OSPIRG piss it away?

  2. Kenny Ocker says:

    Tomcat, you misspelled JoAnna Wendel’s name. Badly.

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