Losesrs or Losers. Does it matter? [UPDATED]
We can now say, unequivocally, that the Oregon Voice staff are giant pussies.
In rejecting our drinking contest invitation, they have obviously faltered in the face of sheer greatness. Don’t worry, kids. I get it. We’re intimidating.
Maybe another time, when you find your balls.
(Also, mentioning my religion in order to get readers to pay attention is wholeheartedly unclassy.)
UPDATE:
I love the Oregon Voice. Truly. The new issue is really sharp, and tells a good story about life at the UO. Of course I disagree on a number of points, but whatever. I have respect for UO publications that actually publish, and with this issue, the OV makes the list.
The Student Insurgent . . . well . . . that’s another story.
Straight-edge?! I met some of you weirdos at a wedding this spring. Blew my fucking mind. I get that fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, but neither is being frigid, sober and boring.
It’s about moderation, Grace. You got to live a little. A bit of booze will flush that stick right out of your ass (it’s science!).
I’m straight-edge. You guys can still drink alone like you normally do.
Actually, it’s not true. The ASUO Senate paid for that.
That’s not biased, Alex, it’s true.
Hey, nice journalistic neutrality Bains.
The Student Insurgent just pays for other groups to go to conferences.
I shared your challenge with some other OV alumni scattered across the state, and raised much interest. However (in classic OV form), we are all too scatterbrained to get it together. I’m in Eugene, but there’s no way I’d make it past the Four Loko round alive if I were to mount the challenge on my own.