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Mile High Rub

Ryanair, a low cost Irish airline company, recently announced that they might start offering in-flight pornography. Michael O‚ÄôLeary, you just blew my goddamn mind. I realize that on long, transcontinental flights you might get bored, then restless, then maybe a little horny (we’ve all been there), but for God’s sake, just slink off to the bathroom and use the sexy slideshow in your head. I’m pretty sure that this wouldn’t make smoothing your runway legal on a plane, which would put it in the same inexplicable category as a porn theater where you can watch but not masturbate (I’ve been burned before). Even if they were to install 3m privacy screens on all the seats (making it impossible for you and a bro to watch Hot Fuzz together), you can still see a little from certain angles, which means some kid in the aisle a few feet back just got a free viewing of My Granny is a Tranny. Speaking of, pornography is a pretty diverse media to say the least of it, so who would decide what movies they choose? If there isn’t a trampoline, clown, and a bowling pin I ain’t even a little interested, so here’s hoping they just skip the really vanilla stuff and just play batshit insane filth with beehives and conjoined twins, because only a real wierdo is going to want to watch a porno in CLEAR VIEW of the young and infirm.

WHERE IS HIS OTHER HAND?

For $12.99 you could be that guy.

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/11/20/fashion/pornography-on-airplanes-where-you-cant-look-away.html?_r=1&hp&fb_source=message

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