ASUO Exec Sam Dotters-Katz has appointed former Senate President Athan Papailiou to the seat recently vacated by Kate Jones. Papailiou is a strong advocate for fiscal responsibility and a friend of the Commentator. He was elected on the Campaign for Change slate and served as Senate President for most of last year.

Also, after consulting with my Senate Exploratory Committee, I have applied for the vacant journalism seat on Senate. Both of our confirmation hearings will be on Wednesday and will be hilarious. For example, here is the cover letter I sent along with my application:

Dear Associated Students of the University of Oregon;

I am writing to apply for ASUO Senate Seat 19: Journalism. I am a journalism major and nominally more intelligent than a trained circus bear, which, from what I’ve seen, qualifies me for the position.

I am interested in the position because the chairs in the ASUO Boardroom look really, really comfortable. Sometimes there are also snacks for ASUO Senators. I am so down for that. I wish to become a part of the ASUO nobility and trod the lowly plebs beneath my gilded feet.

I’m a firm believer in strong, autocratic government. My biggest influences in this regard are, in ascending order: Teddy Roosevelt, Ghengis Khan and Conan (the barbarian). Enclosed is my application, my resume and a picture of me shaking hands with President Frohnmayer. (He’s my bro.) I look forward to hearing your response. Thank you for your time and consideration. Sincerely,

Carl Ciaramella

This entry was posted on Saturday, January 10th, 2009 at 15:07 by CJ Ciaramella and is filed under ASUO, Blowing Stuff Up, Campus, Humor, Politics, Snark, Things Only Ted Cares About. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.