The OC Blog Back Issues Our Mission Contact Us Masthead
Sudsy Wants You to Join the Oregon Commentator

Holistic pictures, manipulative presidents, woeful .036. Ol’ Dirty Digest; Oct. 11, 2010

The News (must have been a slow day):

  • Ben Eckstein is the new ASUO chief of staff. I’m sure Lyzi will have things to say once production is complete on the magazine about this. Such as how, you know, ASUO President Amelie Rousseau — to be generous about it — appears to have blithely flaunted circumvented* ASUO rules for hiring people. My favorite thing about this article is the following, wonderfully opaque Rousseau quote: “It wasn’t necessarily choosing between (Eckstein and Hulen),” she said. “It was looking at the holistic picture.”
  • Serious note: I know the outgoing Conrad Hulen from my time reporting on the ASUO and it’s depressing to learn he’s had a family tragedy so serious he can’t come back to school.
  • There is also another ASUO story about an ASUO committee appointing people to officer positions. If I were a tree felled to have this news printed on paper made of me, I would be upset, despite the fact that, as a tree, I would have no emotions. That is to say, it stands out for its irrelevance.
  • A guy rode a bike. A long way. For charity. Evidently Tijuana is not so bike-friendly, the rest of Baja California is a bit bland, and there’s not really much else to say about the rest of the Pacific coast of North America.


  • The Emerald’s editorial board with a typically bland election-season argument: You should, you know, vote, even if politicians make your skin crawl. Boring. Much more interesting is the UO College Democrats president calling the president’s 2008 campaign “manipulative.” Many people are terrified to criticize the political party to which they profess allegiance, even if it’s true, so I laud her for doing so.
  • Thomas Kyle-Milward opines that the UO has rescheduled graduation to Mondays to make more money and make things easier on faculty and staff, but at the expense of students.
  • Slow news day supplemented by weird news column. The rubber-encased semen of Commonwealth Games athletes is a threat to India’s plumbing! Woman puts glue in eye by mistake, then visits hospital! Cocaine found in butt! Couple buys skeleton! Man doesn’t die in non-explosion!


  • Band of whom some have heard plants advertorial in Emerald! Other band throws party! Restaurant old and quirky!


  • In my opinion, this clip contains all the information you need to know about sports.
  • Oregon Football won a gristly, ugly game.
  • Two volleyball teams from Arizona played Oregon Volleyball this weekend, an exercise apparently geared to producing  unintelligible numbers, such as “hitting a woeful .036” (blood alcohol content?) and “19 kills” (rap sheet?) and lending support to the notion that nobody cares enough about volleyball to explain what the fuck they’re talking about.
  • Oregon Softball played Portland State in a match that evidently unfolded in banal succession of quotes and evaluations, followed by a dizzying and somewhat inscrutable series of declarative sentences in large paragraphs. Sunflower seeds were missed by all.

* I want to emphasize that this is not a barb. It is a correction. Thank you to Andrew for providing the relevant rule, which I seemingly couldn’t be bothered to seek. I acknowledge my mistake.

  1. Responsible Drunk says:

    Tomcat finally showed his true potential on this one! Nice work.

    Now, time to take a holistic picture approach with this beer. Chug chug. Sounds like ASUO is ran by the student government equivalent of Sarah Palin with a dash of OSPIRG. Palin fired a Sheriff that was a former relative, Rousseau fired her political consultant that was her boyfriend. Both give terrible speeches to get out the vote and attack the establishment. Well on to much more important things, chug chug.

  2. I want to emphasize that I’m not condemning it either. I don’t care. On all matters of the ASUO, that is my default position. I want to stress that.

    I was simply mistaken about the procedure, and Andrew clarified that for me, hence the cross-out, which was meant to be a correction, not a barb.

  3. Gsim says:

    This tickled my tummy. Good stuff.

  4. Fizzle T. Bizzle says:

    I have to admit. Hilarious in its own right.

    Also, I’m not defending the actions, but they got a letter from Sinjin approving the bypass of this procedure.

    Until that part of the GTN gets amended, that’s all they need.

    Can I get a “Let’s go, Con Court appeal!”?

  5. Lyzi Diamond says:

    Also, I agree with CJ — Who needs the ODE when you have ATS?

  6. Lyzi Diamond says:

    Especially when you consider the potential behind-the-scenes in-staff animosities. It’s kind of ridiculous.

  7. CJ says:

    This is significantly more enjoyable than actually reading the Ol’ Dirty.

  8. Andrew says:

    PROG R 80.2 (revised 2006) Staff Selection Procedures
    “The following guidelines for staff selection and affirmative action procedures applies to all positions in ASUO recognized programs that are not elected positions unless an exception is granted by the ASUO Programs Administrator.”

    I find it quite silly that the Executive can get an exception granted by their own staff member. Conflict of interest anyone?

Sorry, the comment form is closed at this time.