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Mr. Mojo Uprising

On my way to class today, I stumbled upon a protest. The year had been going so well for me, there being no annoying protests in my immediate vicinity thus far.

Subject of the protest? Axe and their “Mojo Master” online video game. When I first encountered the protesters, they were blocking the sidewalk behind the EMU, and nearby was an Axe promotional rain canopy where typical freebies were being distributed. This being the first I’ve heard of it, I thought I’d look it up. Here’s what the game website says about it:


Many faces have been slapped, many drinks dumped on heads, and many relationships ruined in the name of MOJO MASTER – the fantasy game of seduction. Countless hours have been logged observing social encounters between guys and girls, attempting to better understand the female species, and determining what makes a playa a playa. These laborious studies have given birth to seduction theories that are for experts only. These theories have been applied to a virtual construct – a video game the likes of which you have never seen – that lets you let loose in a fantasy world populated by 100 TOTALLY HOT 3D GIRLS!

Ah. TOTALLY HOT 3D GIRLS! That’s what we are protesting today? Cartoons?

Their chants were led by a drill master armed with a whistle. Holding the classic cardboard and construction-paper signs, the chanters followed the drill master around. The first chant I heard was:

Hey hey ho ho Mojo Master’s got to go!

Obviously they forgot to bring some creative people along. After about 5 minutes they started marching. They did a quick tour around the new “heart of campus” and returned to the area of the Axe canopy, where their chant lost its steam. During this time I was able to read some of their signs:

“Axe stinks” (obviously)… “Stop Rape Culture”… “Rape isn’t cool”… “Consent is beautiful”… Ah. I began to see what they were really protesting. The game evidently promotes rape culture.

The problem is that there are a large number of groups in this country that believe that playing video games cause people to become violent or “desensitized” to similar situations in reality. Play enough Grand Theft Auto and you’ll turn into a car thief and cop killer. Play too much Doom III and you’ll go shoot up your school. Play Mojo Master and you’ll become a rapist.

These beliefs have little to back them. The evidence cited is usually something along the lines of “well, that kid that shot up his school played a lot of GTA and look what he did”. This ignores that fact that millions of people play the same violent video games all the time and do not commit violent acts. There are even arguments that the games provide an outlet for stress and can actually reduce violent behavior. That, and as the attractive girls waiting in the EMU ticket line remarked in disbelief that fifty people would show up to protest something like this, “it’s just a game.”

In the ten minutes it took for me to think of the above and jot my notes down into my PDA (which now I wish had a camera), the protesters managed to come up with a new chant:

[Mojo] women isn’t cool, we want you out of our school!

The first word wasn’t particularly clear, but it sounded like “mojo”. The people next to me (who read the Commentator – must acknowledge the fans) had no idea what the first word was, either. It was amazing how long it took them to decide to use this canned, oft-repeated form of chant. Boring.

During this time, a woman with a sign was also confronting directly the women under the canopy who were giving the free Axe stuff away. The Axe girls held their cool quite nicly, and it didn’t escalate. At some point a public safety officer came along and told the protesters to quit blocking the path. The protesters obliged and their chanting petered out again as they moved and blocked a different walkway.

At this point the way was clear and I got a chance to see a few items under the canopy. The most interesting were mouse pads featuring the TOTALLY HOT 3D GIRLS on them. A few young freshmen were walking away gripping theirs with big smiles. I guess dorm life really is lonely.

New chant:

Five six seven eight! Degrading women is hate

Some people were substituting “raping” in place of “degrading”. This chant has multiple flaws. First of all, they completely messing up the meter and had to strech out the “is” to fill the space of two syllables. Second of all, they forgot a “one two three four” part… it just felt incomplete.

I don’t think many people disagree with the last chant (well, I know some people who do and fortunately they have left the university). I had to get to class at this point of the protest, but my thoughts on the whole thing are as follows:

Like the girls in the ticket line had said, it is “just a game” featuring cartoon women… there are far worse things going on in the world that are absolutely not games. I think Axe stinks, too, but I’m not going to waste time protesting them. If people really think that “rape culture” is a problem in the United States, what have they got to say about South Africa and the other seven countries with higher rape rates than the United States? You know, countries like Australia (#3) and Canada (#5).

There are ways to actually make a difference. Protesting a stupid marketing video game by a company that annoys the crap out of us who have allergies just doesn’t seem like a good use of resources, when the chance someone committing a crime *because* of a video game is extremely unlikely.

If anything, the protest also drew more people. The Axe people were set up in a bad location, exposure-wise. I wouldn’t have noticed them if not for the noises of a protest. The same went for other people around me. Most of them showed up because of the sounds of a protest. Many of them went under the canopy and got their freebies.

Sheesh, this ended up being a full feature when I should be working on my article for the magazine… oops.

  1. Timothy says:

    Dry toast? GUH! Sounds like something my midwestern father would eat.

  2. Don’t tell me, Andy, there were memories of Santa Barbara in that dry toast though…

  3. Andy D says:

    I gagged just thinking about dry toast…ohh, sorry..

  4. Considering that people think I’m as dry as a piece of burnt toast…I think the midwest accent would be perfect.

  5. Timothy says:

    Using the midwestern one will just convince them you’re boring.

    Play too much Doom III and you’ll go shoot up your school.

    If my school were being overrun with hell demons, and I was the only Space Marine left alive? Hell yes I’d shoot it up, duh.

    First of all, they completely messing up the meter and had to strech out the “is” to fill the space of two syllables.

    They should’ve tried: “Five, six, seven, eight! To degrade women is to hate” but that’s really not much better.

  6. I hope not. I’d rather use my Midwestern accent.

  7. Ian says:

    Is faux-English accent one of the moves you can use on the ladies in the game?

  8. Olly says:

    “Five six seven eight! Degrading women is hate” has the worst scansion of any chant I’ve heard in recent memory.

    I don’t think the defense of the game based on “well, there are worse things happening in other places” is terribly convincing.

    On the other hand, I also don’t think this retarded marketing conceit is in any way, shape, or form promoting “rape culture”.

    I am using bullet points for no very good reason.

  9. Ian says:

    I hadn’t heard of this game before today’s protest. Thanks Women’s Center!

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