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Sudsy Wants You to Join the Oregon Commentator

Get Rich Quick Scheme #48531: “You Know, I’m Bald Too!”

Am I Seeing Double?!?!?

A Portland, Ore., man is suing Michael Jordan because, he says, he’s often mistaken for the basketball superstar and is tired of it.

Allen Heckard is also suing Nike founder Phil Knight for making Jordan one of the most recognized men in the world, KGW-TV, Portland, reports.

He’s asking for a combined $832 million — $416 million each.

“I’m constantly being accused of looking like Michael and it makes it very uncomfortable for me,” Heckard said.


  1. Donald says:

    I think he should have a waaa-burger and some french cries. This is just the dumbest thing I have ever heard!

  2. Stanley says:

    I think that is disgusting, he could have made himself look different. It’s just another one of those ridiculous get-rich scheme, he doesn’t deserve one penny.

  3. C-T says:

    But at least you woulda spelt kindergarten right…

  4. C-T says:

    You’d get that automatically if you didn’t have the “game” of a kindergardener.

  5. Jared says:

    I look like Jude Law. What do you Commentator guys think? I should sue his ass! But not for money, but for access to 1/100th of the women who want to do him.

  6. Olly says:

    He should have claimed that the “Be Like Mike” ads constituted an deliberately misleading portrayal of his life. I think that’d be solid gold.

  7. Zack says:

    I hope he wins, Mr. Heckard has clearly been wronged.

  8. Andy says:

    TYLER G. give me a call – my number is on facebook.

  9. Ben says:

    Trust me, Oregonians aren’t the only ones doing absurdly stupid things and getting coverage in the media because of it. Just take a look at some of the news coming out of Nevada or Idaho, and down here in California we have more than our fair share of headline-grabbing wacko’s.

    A couple of weeks ago a man was found to be keeping something like 1,500 rats in a tiny apartment in Petaluma. The animals were seized and, though in good health, most of them were destroyed by Sonoma County Animal Control. He now has a significant internet following. So big that the paper in Sonoma County has choosen to report on it.

    I think the difference is that no one really expects this sort of behavior to come out of Oregon so it seems kind of novel.

  10. Amy H says:

    Why are OREGONIANS always the ones who do dumb shit like this? Can’t we be in the news for something NOT so ridiculous?

  11. Miles Rost says:

    He should make a career out of impersonating Jordan. He’d make more money that way…

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