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Democratic Debate III: The Last Temptation of Toxie

The next question is about Katrina.

This is the most boring question yet. I know, I can’t believe it either. The candidates all agree: The Bush administration screwed this up. Duh!

Edwards talks about how he personally rebuilt New Orleans. But then he talks about how we need to pay the citizens of N.O. to rebuild their own damn city.

Obama agrees. He says that the citizens of N.O. were always neglected.

Next question: “What side are you on concerning outsourcing.”

Gravel: “It is not the problem.” He claims that taxation is a problem, along with how the other candidates want to fund healthcare (I think; it’s hard to tell with Gravel sometimes).

Dodd disagrees, obviously. Clinton stands “against the tide of outsourcing.” Could she be anymore of a populist?

We need to have better healthcare and education, according to Biden. And Richardson says that outsourcing is a problem, and he wants to make education better to keep jobs in the states. He fails to realize that outsourcing exists because it’s cheaper, not because education is lacking. He also fail to realize that outsourcing is creating a surge in America’s managerial class.

Edwards talks about how the mill his dad worked at closed and moved someplace else — probably to India.

Kucinich wants to end NAFTA. He’s a moron.

YES! THE LAST QUESTION!!!! This one is about Darfur.

Dodd blames the situation on Iraq. Drink!

Clinton thinks we should get NATO involved. She also thinks we need to shoot down Sudanese planes — fucking warmonger.

Note: My beer is running dangerously low. Thank God there are only eight minutes to go.

Richardson thinks that fighting genocide is more important than sports. I knew this debate was going to be full of hard stances!

Kucinich says that if Sudan had a lot of oil, we’d probably be occupying it now. Umm, is Kucinich an idiot? Sudan has a shit ton of oil, and it’s actually extremely vital to the country’s economy. At least it used to be. Great zinger there, you freakish troll.

Gravel says that everyone else on the stage has no judgment.

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