Wish Granted
Dear Commentator Staff,
Please invest more time and effort into the criticism and ridicule of what is called “The Weekly Enema”.
Sincerely,
The Brainerd lab monitor who had to stay after close so those stupid assholes could exploit the free printer for their sorry shitrag.
P.S. They wrote some dumb shit about Sudsy being renamed Spelunky or some shit. [ED NOTE:This is true.]
Thank you for your letter, Brainerd lab monitor. We highly value your concerns and feedback, and we will do our best to accommodate your request … starting now.
Yeah, we lost a drinking contest – disgrace, ignominy, etc. The Weekly Enema wrote about it (as linked above). The only thing I really feel the need to comment on is this sentence from the, err, article:
“[W]ould it kill you guys to get a keg of a nice microbrew? Like CD players and choking yourself, Miller High Life went out of fashion in high school.”
Considering that I put a whole keg on my debit card and didn’t ask the Enema staff (or anyone else) to chip in for it, they’ve got a lot of sack to criticize my beer choice. In fact, if they’re going to whine about drinking my beer, the Enema staff can (1) die in a tire fire and (2) consider any future Commentator events they attend to be BYOB. Cheers!
