Did your candidate lose? Did you fail a midterm? Throw yourself a pity party. Wrap yourself up in blankets and shut yourself away from the warmth of your family and friends, you freak. Why don’t you go watch yourself some reruns of LOST and convince yourself that your theories aren’t a waste of time. Hey, Christmas is coming up—why don’t you ask Santa for a new pillow to cry into? But fer fuck’s sake, put down that tub of “Chubby Hubby.”

If your self-loathing is truly complete you will stuff your disappointed face with ice-cream that tastes like an awful idea. Portland ice-cream cart Junior Ambassador’s wants a grant to make a full seven-course Thanksgiving dinner à la crème glacée.  Their proposed flavors include such abortions as waldorf salad, deviled eggs with bacon, and of course, turkey with yam and marshmallows.  But before the phrase, “Gag me with a spoon” takes on new literal merit, I want to address the best idea they proposed— “Pecan Pie and Ice cream Ice cream.” I cannot even begin to wrap my mind around the concept of ice cream tasting…wait for it… like ICE CREAM. Using reflexive properties in the culinary world is never, ever a bad idea.  I stand firmly behind Junior Ambassador in their quest to nauseate and (potentially) delight. But only to further science.

This entry was posted on Sunday, November 7th, 2010 at 04:19 by Nick Dreyer and is filed under Crazy, Humor, Worthless. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.