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You People Are So Screwed

Via Drudge: Scientists discover growing volcanic bulge in Eastern Oregon.

A large, slow-growing volcanic bulge in Eastern Oregon is attracting the attention of seismologists who say that the rising ground could be the beginnings of a volcano or simply magma shifting underground.

That’s right, Bend, nature is coming for you.

  1. Timothy says:

    Bryan: Was that the same vapid cigarette girl who asked Levi if he’d ever killed a man?

    Sho: The difference between potatoes and corn.

  2. Sho says:

    Maybe she got Iowa switched up with Idaho. Iowa, Idaho. Both full of whitey. What’s the difference?

  3. bryan says:

    I spoke with a girl in Texas who thought that Oregon bore some geographical proximity to Iowa– and any number of people who were quite certain that the entirety of our state is encrusted in ice year-round.

  4. Danimal says:

    Shoulda gone with reverse vampires.

  5. Timothy says:

    Man, my half-assed attempt at ginning up some panic sure did fail miserably.

  6. Danimal says:

    5-year-old news, whatever. This is geology.

  7. Michael G. says:

    Dan, you probably hit the money with that comment.

    Oh, and I have no idea why I wrote “1991” when it was supposed to be “2001”… oh well.

  8. Danimal says:

    My guess as to “why this is receiving so much attention now” — after any major natural disaster, local reporters feel an urge to write “it could happen here” stories.

    When, in the event of a hurricane striking a below-sea-level city, it actually couldn’t happen here, they go for the next best thing: Well, what the hell could happen here? And so they dig up 15-year-old news that nobody has yet paid much attention to because the rate of swelling is so slow that it’s really not an imminent threat.

  9. Sho says:

    To be fair, I’m sure there’s a few of us Oregonians who know very little about east coast geography.

    Worst example: I have a friend who’s going to school in Baltimore and was asked by someone who lives in Portland, “So, how’s New York?” For some reason, I think the Portlander thought Baltimore was part of NYC. (Mind you, this was someone who smokes a lot of pot.)

  10. Gabrielle says:

    You how everyone else sees Oregon. It is this large state that extends from the coast to the cascades. Therefore anything not in the Willamette Valley(aka the central portion of the state) is waaaay east. Why, Bend is practically in Idaho, didn’t you know?

  11. Michael G. says:

    Old news. It was discovered five years ago. The first USGS statement about it was released May 8, 1991. Last year there was an earthquake swarm under the bulge, no non-local news outlets seemed interested enough to mention it much then.

    I don’t know why this is receiving so much attention now, but a lot more news outlets are talking about the bulge. You’ll notice the Yahoo article didn’t bother to mention any dates. It leaves room for people to think that the bulge was discovered last week.

    Another gripe about the Yahoo article: The bulge is not really in “eastern Oregon”. It’s not even east of the crest of the Cascades.

    Anyway, for more USGS information:
    Three Sisters.
    West uplift.

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