McCain to be Brutally Abused, by Himself
Senator John McCain (R-AZ) has officially gone off the deep end. In an attempt to get voters to see him as, oh i don’t even know what, he will re-subject himself to the anguish and abuse that he experienced 40 years ago in a Vietnamese POW Camp. In a blatant political tactic, McCain claims he is trying to get back to his roots and reconnect with the struggles that defined him as a leader. What concerns me more than the cost of this project, $10 million, is that McCain has planned out the whole thing to a T. He is having himself blown out of a plane, captured, and then taken to a rat and bug infested cell. And to think I thought McCain would be the hope of the Republicans. I’ve already decided to vote for Obama but this might even push me to change my party affiliation. Check out the whole story at The Onion.
Note: The poster would like to add that although she believed The Onion to be a true publication at the time of authoring, that belief had changed at the time of posting. The choice to post was made for two reasons. 1) the author feels that this is a fairly humorous fictional story about the senator and 2) she did want to publicly laugh at herself for thinking, even for a moment, that this could in fact be true. She invites you as well to laugh on both accounts. She also apologizes for previous spelling errors.
Lest we all forget this classic McCain quote:
“I hate the gooks. I will hate them as long as I live.”
‘Course he was talking about the VC. My dad hated them too and he never had an extended holiday at the Hanoi Hilton.
So, yeah: McCain is pretty much indestructible like the Incredible Hulk. MCAIN SMASH PUNY HARRY REID!
Can McCain actually be hurt, the way other candidates can, by saying something catastrophically stupid? That’s just that thing that he does, and the press eats it out of his hand. Ahem: Bomb bomb bomb, bomb bomb Iran!
I only, like, surwatched the debate by reading live-blogged posts.
“Ok, hypothetically speaking, say McCain gets the Rep. nomination…”
I still think McCain won’t last long on the campaign trail without losing his temper and saying something catastrophically stupid.
Speaking of which, did anyone else watch the debate last night?
Ok, hypothetically speaking, say McCain gets the Rep. nomination, and Clinton gets the democratic. We won’t have to choose between the lessor of 2 evils; but rather the smaller of two can’s of crazy.
I’m not sure if the folks at the Onion would be insulted or complimented that you thought this was real. Two things that might make you feel better:
1) I wouldn’t be overly surprised if McCain were that crazy
2) Although the Onion is fake, the structure of the news writing so closely parodies the actual “inverted pyramid” news style that professors in the J-school have been known to use the stories as an example of that style. So, they read very much like real stories.
chris-
maybe you should write for the blog. at least your story is real
Meh, he’s pretty nuts anyway.
“In times of crisis such as this, we must stand united, not divided,” Clinton said. “We must join together as one nation under a groove, getting down just for the funk of it.”
Oh my God Sho, you just made my year.
Haha, Nicole doesn’t know the difference between news and satire.
Tim: I agree. We wouldn’t have been in this situation in Iraq if President Clinton had dropped da bomb on Baghdad in the first place.
You know, I think the world would be better if The Onion were real (how did you not know?) and if Victor Charlie had gotten McCain all those years ago.
Click on “JustaDog’s” link if you want to find out how a “Criminal Hispanic Destroyed Bridge.” Maybe McCain was brain damaged by a Criminal Hispanic.
Also: Yay, Tancredo ’08!!!!!!!!!!!!
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McCain is a jerk that doesn’t know if he’s Republican or Democrat. I think he’s been brain damaged in ‘nam.
My (easy) prediction: He will drop out (loose) any attempt at the presidency.
yes…
De Lancie- you have to be kidding me. You know the Onion isn’t real, right? Way to keep busy in the ASUO Office.