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Sudsy Wants You to Join the Oregon Commentator

Sudsy’s Brother By Another Mother

In the event of Sudsy’s untimely demise, I propose the Malaysian pen-tailed tree shrew as the Commentator’s new mascot:

A tiny tree-shrew that lives on alcoholic nectar could – pound for pound – drink the average human under the table, scientists have discovered.

Frank Wiens, from the University of Bayreuth in Germany, and colleagues confirmed the animals’ high alcohol consumption by analysing their hair.

Chemicals in the hair samples showed that on any given night, a tree-shrew had a 36% chance of being drunk by human standards.

Historically speaking, the Commentator has not been a fan of shrews, most of them seeming a bit humorless and angry, but this one sounds like it’d fight right in up in room 319.

  1. Vincent says:

    Well, if you eat too much of it, South LA might ban it.

  2. Braden says:

    What happens if I eat it?

  3. Vincent says:

    Can you tame that monkey on your back, constantly gnawing away at your sanity and health?

  4. Timothy says:

    Can we tame them?

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