Oh Shit Zombies Save the Booze
The fifth annual zombie walk was held on Valentines Day, described as a general screw you to the cliches of the Hallmark Holiday. Bloody festivities started at Pioneer Cemetery, where the organizer laid down the rules, including “Don’t bite anyone, don’t get in the way of traffic, and don’t overcrowd the bars.”
After waiting roughly an hour for stragglers, the horde began its grisly walk to Taylors and the festivities began. If a venue was at capacity, the almost-undead moved on to the next. Walking dead were seen at Diablo’s, John Henry’s, and the Horse Head in addition to the bars around campus.
“Bar’s love us,” remarked a participant, her mouth caked with fake blood made from starch and food coloring. Indeed, Diablo’s had gone out of its way to accommodate the walking dead with skeleton themed decor and DJ’s that played Thriller.
But all good things must end, and by the time the horde left Diablo’s, it had fractured into smaller cells, which quickly split off to go to their own pubs. See all the gruesome action below.
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- Costumes ranged from super elaborate to smeared blood.
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- Zombies drink red ales, because red is also the color of blood.
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- A number of zombie hunters also hit the bars on sunday, seen here delivering a coup de grâce.
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- Everyone’s favorite cricket bat wielding, flower giving, mother loving zombie hunter.
Are these the people in front of Agate Hall?
Man, fuck those Zombie assholes. I almost killed one with a car on Sunday night. Mostly because his dumbass decided to try and walk out in front of my car as a joke.
Do you know what’s not a joke? Your crushed legs when I run you over, you Zombie fuck.
I take Zombies seriously. It’s good thing I wasn’t really drunk else I might have forgotten and actually removed a head or two.